In short, adults are human too!
As adults we have been given the emotional capacity to react appropriately, to handle emotional situations well, to be the adult. However, we are also human and our reaction to children who say ‘please and thank you’ will be more positive.
This means that when a child says, “Please may I?” or when a child says, “Thanks so much,” we are likely to respond in a much more favourable way towards them, thus reinforcing positive behaviour.
We are also much more likely to respond… period…
I’ll be honest, I like good manners.
I appreciate children with good manners, and I respond well to children who have good manners. I in fact go out of my way to compliment children with good manners!
I find it difficult to respond well to children without manners.
An everyday occurrence that brings this to light is when collecting children after school. Without a hello or any greeting, three children organising play dates around me, another whingeing that they are hungry, and all the while needing to get to an afternoon activity. This all happening after a difficult meeting in the office… I may just not respond positively to the child who “wants” something. I certainly will answer the child who says, “Hello Mum, please…”
I respond the same towards my own children and children I don’t know… when it is positive!
Towards all children I will say, “It is a pleasure, my Angel,” or “What good manners…” I will most certainly always smile at please and thank you and I will almost certainly comment about good manners and kindness displayed…
When the opposite happens… and manners are forgotten… I will remind my own children of the magic words. Please and thank you!
I will however not discipline someone else’s children – in a normal non-life-threatening situation – I will just unemotionally simply ignore them.
And right there is why children who say please and thank you, have their self-esteem built daily.
Children with good manners will just naturally benefit from a positive reaction. Is this not what all children want and need?
Positivity from others builds your own self-esteem. It goes without saying that a child’s confidence, sense of worth and general happiness benefits from all things positive!
Let’s start with a simple, please and thank you!